Welcome To My Life
by TEAnCRRRUMPETS
Summary: Songfic based on Simple Plan's "Welcome to My Life". A 6th year Ginny looks back on her first year, in which Tom Riddle ruined her life and made her believe things about herself that were not true.


Do you ever feel like breaking down?  
Do you ever feel out of place,  
Like some how you just don't belong,  
And no one understands you?  


You were the only person that understood me, and you were simply a memory from the past. In the real world, I had no-one. Why did I feel so alone? I had to force myself not to cry when I saw everyone happy and laughing, but all I wanted to do was scream and shout. Why couldn't you have been real?

_  
_Do you ever want to run away?  
Do you lock yourself in your room?   
With the radio on turned up so loud,  
That no one hears you screaming?  


I had to use a Silencing Charm at night, when I would close the hangings of my bed, to stop everyone in the dorms from hearing my screams. I even have to use a Healing Charm to hide the gashes. I couldn't deal back then. I can't now.

_  
_No, you don't know what it's like,  
When nothing feels alright,   
You don't know what it's like,  
To be like me  


Everyone had it so much better than me. They all had friends, people they could talk to, and I had no-one. Not a soul.

_  
_To be hurt, to feel lost,  
To be left out in the dark,  
To be kicked, when you're down,  
To feel like you've been pushed around,  
To be on the edge of breaking down,  
When no one's there to save you,  
No you don't know what it's like,  
Welcome to my life  


Every day was a constant struggle. I never knew where I was mentally. I was scared, and I was always feeling down. Whenever I got picked on, no-one helped but they all joined in. Every day was the same. Welcome to yet another day in my life.

_  
_Do you want to be somebody else?  
Are you sick of feeling so left out?  
Are you desperate to find something more,  
Before your life is over?  


Why couldn't I be Hermione? She's so smart, and clever, and kind. I wished I was her. She had Ron and Harry as friends. I wanted more from life than what I had. He knew I did.

_  
_Are you stuck inside a world you hate?  
Are you sick of everyone around?  
With the big fake smiles and stupid lies,  
While deep inside you're bleeding?  


I pretended to everyone that I was okay, though. I had to, for mum and dad. All I did was smile. My jaw hurt from all the smiling I was forced to do. All I wanted to do was bleed myself until there was nothing left but a shell.

No you don't know what it's like,  
When nothing feels alright,   
You don't know what it's like,  
To be like me  


_No one understands you, Ginevra, I know that, but I'm here for you. You should know that._

I did know that Tom, but you never knew what it was like to be me.

_  
_To be hurt, to feel lost,  
To be left out in the dark,  
To be kicked, when you're down,  
To feel like you've been pushed around,  
To be on the edge of breaking down,  
When no one's there to save you,  
No you don't know what it's like,  
Welcome to my life  


I knew you wanted to understand me, Tom, but you were never going to save me, really. You poisoned me, damaged me for life, and I let you. How naïve I was back then. How young I was.

_  
_No one ever lies straight to your face  
No one ever stabs you in the back  
You might think I'm happy,  
But I'm not gonna be okay   


You used to tell me you loved me. You lied, day in, day after. I spit on every time you said it. You even had the guts to tell me that when I lay in the chamber, close to death. You'd promised me you'd never hurt me. You lied again. The nights I gave my blood so you could come out for a little while, and you threw it back in my face. You tried to kill my idol, Harry, and you used me as the person who would make you strong, one of the two people who would die so you could come to power again. I was happy then to do it. I had nothing to live for. I do now. I can't believe you could do this to me.

_  
_Everybody always gave you what you wanted  
You never had to work, it was always there  
You don't know what it's like (what it's like)...  


You, the Dark Lord, you had everything served to you, didn't you? If you wanted a sacrifice, all it took was a snap of your fingers and one of your loyal servants would give their life for you. Everything you want, you had. You claimed to be there for me to talk to, but you never understood what I talked about, the feelings I felt.

_  
_To be hurt, to feel lost,  
To be left out in the dark,  
To be kicked, when you're down,  
To feel like you've been pushed around,  


You made me feel loved, for a while, that's true, but I realised now that you were one of the people who kicked me when I was down. You built me up, and then knocked me down as soon as you'd taken what you wanted from me. You'd promised to make me feel good, you promised to be the one who led me back to the light, but instead, you left me in the darkest of places; my thoughts and memories of all the things you made me do.

_  
_To be on the edge of breaking down,  
When no one's there to save you,  
No you don't know what it's like,  
To be hurt, to feel lost,  
To be left out in the dark,  
To be kicked, when you're down,  
To feel like you've been pushed around,  
To be on the edge of breaking down,  
When no one's there to save you,  
No you don't know what it's like,  
Welcome to my life  
  
Welcome to my life  


Thank you for everything Tom you've made me stronger, even though I still think back to when I was naïve and believed everything you said.

We're now fighting the war against you, and I've come face to face with you, and all I say to you is welcome to my life. This war was like the war that went on in my mind when you tainted me.

Welcome to my life


End file.
